Complaint Department

As a shop owner/designer/publisher I am required to wear many different hats. In the Customer Service area alone I deal with questions, comments and of course complaints. Nobody is perfect, and I am not using that as an excuse, just a simple statement of fact. Every now and then, no matter how hard we try, we screw up.

The mistakes that the staff and I might make in the store are easy to fix. They are mostly made one-on-one with a single customer. Publishing mistakes are a MUCH bigger issue! I write instructions, do my own sample sewing, have others proof read and often the published patterns have been distributed to my shop clubs where dozens of people have used them before they go to print. Still, every now and then you get that call that starts "Did you know that there is a mistake in ......" and panic mode sets in! OMG! If it really is a mistake (and not a confused customer) correcting it can be overwhelming. I immediately begin the process of contacting vendors, consumers, other shops, posting corrections on the website, mailing corrected copies...... a nightmare.

At the other end of the customer complain spectrum are letters like this one. Hand scrawled hate mail from someone so frustrated with one of my patterns that they took the time to pen me a detailed letter about what a miserable human being I am for writing such horrendously bad instructions. These make me smile.

I know that on first impression the fact that I find this humorous doesn't seem very customer service oriented, but inevitably these letters are written by people that are their own worst enemy. The letter featured here was received last week and has detailed issues with our Easy Stripped Table Runner pattern. Really? I have been publishing that pattern in one form or another since the mid 1980's. We sell an average of 1000 copies a month and it has been on the best seller list for the last several years. More than a handful of people have had success using the step-by-step illustrated instructions that are included in the pattern that has only FIVE seams. There is a very good chance that in this particular instance, it isn't me with the problem.

Now I am faced with the issue of how to respond.

The author of this particular letter begins by telling me that she has been sewing for 49 years, quilting for 5, has a doctorate degree and is not stupid. She goes on to explain that it took her "hours to engineer a 60 degree triangle for the runner".

Dear Not Stupid in California,
I am sorry to hear that you are having issues with our Easy Striped Table Runner pattern. Please keep in mind that the materials list for a quilting project is much like the list of ingredients for a recipe. On the back of the Easy Striped Table Runner pattern you will find a list of materials necessary to make the project. Clearly listed between "thread for assembly and machine quilting" and "basic sewing supplies" is "Creative Grids 60 Degree triangle ruler" an important ingredient for the success of your project. This is the same ruler that is shown in the step-by-step photographs that accompany the written instructions. Attempting to make the project without the proper tools is akin to preparing beef stew without purchasing beef.

..... um... too snarky?

Ms. California also goes on to take issue with my use of the word "equilateral" in reference to the type of triangle needed for this project. She points out that the word equilateral means "all three sides need to be the same"...... uh, I agree? According to her drafting experience "You cannot make a 60 degree triangle that is equal for the 8 1/2 inch strip".

Dear Ms. California,

As a resident of the state of Pennsylvania I am unaware of any laws in the state of California that prohibit the use of 8 1/2 inch increments in basic geometry. To complete the Easy Striped Table Runner project I suggest that you purchase the required ruler from your local quilt shop. If sales of the 8 1/2 inch size are somehow prohibited in your state, the ruler is also available in a 12 1/2 inch size a well. You can also order the ruler directly from our website. We are willing to ship rulers across state lines at any time.

...bad idea. Ms. California probably isn't the type to appreciate my sense of humor.

And my favorite part of the letter: "My God, you charge $10 for this pattern"! Which is signed with her name, followed by "Esq." - meaning she is an attorney.

Dear Esq.
I am deeply troubled by your dissatisfaction with our Easy Striped Table Runner pattern. In an attempt to rectify the situation I would like to refund my profit from your purchase. Unfortunately I do not sell the pattern for $10. I retail it for $8.50 both in our store and on our website. Your purchase was made from another shop that ordered wholesale through a distributor and established their own retail in our free enterprise system. Our wholesale cost is $4.25 - 30% for the distributor or $2.97. Subtract from that the cost of the bag, color printing, paper, employee payroll to fold and ship the pattern and we are left with .86 cents. Would you like that in the form of a check or shall I make a charitable donation in your name?

....nope. She probably wouldn't like that either.

Customer Service experts will tell you that one disgruntled customer is like one bad apple. They can spread rot and ruin your entire reputation that you have worked so hard to build. I spend a portion of every day, and I do mean every day - 7 days a week, talking to customers via email and phone, helping them understand techniques, find old issues of free patterns or pages they have lost. I've talked many a customer through enlarging or reducing a project or helped them to understand that what the instructions say and what they are doing might not be the same thing. If Ms. Disgruntled had dashed off an email or picked up the phone I or one of my employees would have been happy to talk her through drafting a triangle using any brand of rotary ruler. We would have pointed out the importance of the blunt tip on the Creative Grids brand and explained why that is our ruler of choice.

Because she eloquently stated that she intends to "not walk, but RUN" the next time she sees my name on a pattern I think we have past the point of talking her through the issues she described. Therefore I am appealing to you, loyal blog readers, for opinions on how to respond to this letter. You are officially in charge of this persons Customer Service. Post a comment. If you were in her shoes, what would make you happy? Go for it.

Pavement Hell

Let's start with the assumption that inhaling the fumes from hot asphalt year after year destroys brain cells. At least that would provide some plausible explanation as to why my 4 DAY paving project took 4 WEEKS to complete.

Yes, I've been living in blacktop hell and I think of Phil as the Devil himself.

Phil is the person that we contracted to dig up our front parking lot, add several inches of new limestone for drainage and repave... IN APRIL!

We had a very wet spring. That put Phil behind. I understood. Mother Nature is not to be messed with. Phil assured us that he would be here in May. I understood, shuffled classes, made adjustments. No Phil. June 1st, Phil was still behind. More shuffling, more adjusting. I suggested that Phil wait until the first week of August to do our job. We are closed the first week of August and he could have the whole place to himself for an entire week. Phil laughed. He would be long gone by August 1st. Ours was a "little" 4 day job - if that! Probably wouldn't take more than 3 days. He would be here next week at the latest... he recited that exact statement to me each week for 4 consecutive weeks.

July 1st, just 4 months behind schedule, Phil delivered equipment to our parking lot. Then Phil got sick. He sent his "crew" to do the job. "The Plan" was for the men to dig up 1/2 of the lot, stone it and put down the base. Customers would have half of the lot to use. The next day they would repeat the process for the other half of the lot while customers parked on the base. Day three was "planned" to be a Sunday when we are closed, the top coat would go on the entire lot.

That would have been nice.

That isn't how it happened.

Phil's guys didn't understand "The Plan"

Phil's guys tore up the pavement and delivered crushed concrete. Crushed concrete isn't limestone. Limestone drains, crushed concrete doesn't. That explains the giant puddle in the photo. The whole reason for doing the job was to provide drainage and prevent heaving in the winter. We paid for limestone - We wanted limestone. We made them rip several ton of crushed concrete out and do it again. That took a week. Phil's guys weren't happy. Phil understood, but he still couldn't make them understand "The Plan".

Then the hydraulics broke on the paving machine and I left town for a week. My darling husband promised me that he would do his best to have Phil out of our life by the time I got back. I still love him anyway.

While I was away the Stooges managed to dig a trench and fill it in, forgetting that it was to be filled with the rock that was in the truck just 3 feet away. Do over #2.

They also managed to dig up our entrance drive (thank heaven we also have an exit drive at the opposite end of the lot) park their equipment and leave for the weekend. I was not happy when I returned and neither was Mother Nature. She stormed and dumped 18 inches of mud in our catch basin. Phil's guys had to clean it out.

I have a friend that keeps threatening to make t-shirts that say "Life is hard. It's even harder when you are stupid". I would like to buy them for Phil's Stooges.

Yesterday was the virtual straw that broke the camels back. Paving day. They were finally ready to put the top coat on the entire lot. Remembering "The Plan", they were to pave one half at a time. I remembered the plan - they didn't. I began to eye the steamroller and plot evil deeds.

All of our customers were forced to use the back parking lot - where the workmen stashed all of their equipment and trucks eating up more than half of the parking spaces. Then they had to enter through the back door and climb down a flight of stairs! We also had to receive UPS, FedEx and a tractor trailer delivery of a sewing center and cabinet down that same flight of stairs. Phil had to go. What ever it takes, Phil needed to be gone by the end of the day!!! I had had ENOUGH!

At 6pm I returned to the lot to find this. They ran out of asphalt with 3 feet left to go!

Just shoot me now....

Today they returned to "finish" the job, get out of my life, and they are done....

Except that they have to come back "later" to paint the lines for the parking spaces. I said "Great, you can do that next week while we are closed". Phil looked at me with his best Customer Service smile and replied "Can't. I'm on vacation next week."

I hope my $24,000 has a good time at the beach.

On The Road Again

Hello from sunny and sweltering hot San Antonio, Texas

I'm off again on another business trip. This time to south Texas in the middle of July for BERNINA University. I lead such a glamorous life. Why a company would book a convention in south Texas when the average daily temperature is in triple digits is beyond me, but a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do.

I do have to admit that the River Walk here is absolutely beautiful. Anyone that has the opportunity to visit would have to be jealous that their hometown doesn't have one. Wait - I live in the Pittsburgh area and we have three rivers! How hard would it be to dig a few canals, line them with fabulous shops and restaurants and beautiful landscaping? Someone should get right on that.

If you follow my blog, you already know that some of my travel woes are legendary. This trip started out a bit rocky when I attempted to print my boarding passes the evening before we left. A process that should be no big deal. Three hours and six phone calls later and I will admit to heaping some serious verbal a** kicking on the customer "service" operator, I had the required boarding passes. It took that long because the discount ticket agent that I used (Cheap-O Air - which should have been my first clue) "adjusted" our flights way back in April and "forgot" to "push the change thought the system" - for three months. Despite the phone conversation I had with them just three days earlier.

On the first flight I had the opportunity to catch up on some serious business reading. On the second flight I had the joy of sitting next to Quinn, an 8 year old traveling alone on his way home from his Grandma's and a trip to Disneyland. His very thoughtful Grandma packed him an entire backpack of sugary treats to keep him occupied on the trip. - gee thanks Grandma. I can attest to the fact that a zip lock bag of Oreo's, Sweedish Fish, Starburst Fruit Chews and a Slim Jim topped off with a can of Sprite are a volatile combination. - special thanks to the flight attendant that offered me a free glass of wine, but that even I don't drink at 10:30am. But I digress.

One of the business articles that I read was on Customer Service - or the lack of it, which I was experiencing first hand. In this article the business Guru's make a point that in order to provide excellent customer service, you should ask your customers what they want. Good idea.

So while I am sweltering on the River Walk here in south Texas, I have chores for you. Respond with a comment to this message and answer the following questions. I know that many of you are located in other states so you don't shop in my store, but you may order from us online. You can respond to my questions with answers that would apply to your own local quilt shop. Take part, participate, I will make it worthwhile. You have until July 24th to leave a comment, on the 25th I will use a random number generator to select a comment to receive a beautiful 8 piece fat quarter bundle. - that 2 yards of fabric for doing a little homework! Here are your questions:

What ONE thing could we do to improve customer service?

What ONE service could we add to make it more convenient to shop with us?

What ONE class or event could we add that you would like to attend?