Saturday, September 13, 2008

Communication Issues

Most marriage councilors will tell you that one rule for a great marriage is to have excellent communication. On the 16th of this month my husband and I will be married for 31 years. We may be the exception to that rule.

I mentioned to my husband that I received a message from Debby. At this moment I can’t remember why I mentioned it or why I felt the need to tell him about it or why I started the whole conversation in the first place. It went something like this:

Me: I got an email from Deb.

Husband: Deb in New Jersey (a fellow shop owner)

Me: No, Debby

Husband: The one in Texas? (another fellow shop owner)

Me: No, let me finish.

Husband: Go ahead and finish, but how am I suppose to know which Deb you mean? Debbie from the restaurant last night? (someone that I went to high school with who happened to be having dinner at the same time)

Me: NO, stop guessing! Debby, MY Debby, the one that works with me.

Husband: Oh, why didn’t you say so? Did the kids call?

Me: Yes, Lauren & Jon called.

Husband: John? Bernie’s John?

Me: No, your son-in-law Jon.

Husband: The landscaper?

Me: NO, Jon, your son-in-law, Lauren’s husband. Remember the big party last week? You wore a tux.

Husband: Woa. Son-in-law? That’s gonna take some getting use to…… (and he left the room).
It's a good thing we took a vow.


Anonymous said...

That sounds exactly like the conversations at our house at times. Does that happen after a certain time like so many anniversaries that go by or do they get used to your voice like the kids did and don't listen any more ???? Maybe we need to change our voices or call them by a different name like we did with the kids. JP

Anonymous said...

At least you're not alone...and it wouldnt have made a difference if you said "Debby from the store" He'd probably say "what store"???You KNOW we've had those conversations for 33 years. There is John my husband, John our son, John my brother in law, and TWO nephews named John. Thankfully our daughter broke up with an old boyfriend ...John Johnston. I do have 2 Karens and 2 Janets. Aren't you glad you only have one Bernie???

banjo795 said...

I agree that it must have something to do with the length of the marriage. My DH and I will be married for 30 years on the 30th of this month. I think that when two people have been married that long, they feel that they know each other so well, that they know what the other is going to say. But I have to admit that I'm the one who usually does the "you mean so-and-so from....?" type of questions!